condescend to calm this riot in your mind

[unknowable]

[The last month or so has not been easy. First the zombies, and everything that entailed - what he made Ronan do, Ronan's guilt, all the pain afterward. And then, in the midst of that, Gansey disappearing. They weathered it better than Adam would once have expected, better than he even really expected at the time. He always plans for the worst, but Ronan is better than that. He always has been.

They made it out the other side, still alive, still intact, still together. Adam does not know how to put into words how grateful he is for that, how incredible it is that their connection is as strong as ever. Ronan makes being in Hadriel less of a torture and more of - well, a vacation, maybe, a temporary removal from Henrietta and Aglionby and Adam's oncoming future. Here, they have each other, and a few friends, and they don't need much else.

Adam keeps himself busy, though. He doesn't know how to do anything else, even though he's slowly growing fond of lazy mornings in bed with Ronan, hours spent doing nothing in particular but talking and kissing and touching. He can't do it forever, though, Adam is the sort of creature who needs to keep himself busy and useful. He finds something around the house to take care of, takes Aspen for a walk, goes to the orchard to pull weeds. Most regularly, he goes to the clinic.

He's spent half the day there, organizing and helping out, and when he steps out of the repurposed house he's not overly surprised to see Ronan lingering nearby. It's not so strange to see him at the clinic at all, and certainly not when Adam is there. Adam smiles, a quick but genuinely pleased thing, and walks over.]

Hey.

Comments

[unknowable]

[He likes that feeling, the faint tug of Ronan's hand in his hair, not enough to hurt but enough to know that Ronan wants this, wants him. Not that that was ever in doubt, not really - not with the sounds Ronan is making, the way he moves. Adam loves those sounds, he loves the sound of Ronan's voice when they do this, loves the way Ronan's defenses drop and things just spill out.

He knows Ronan won't last too long, and that's okay with him. He likes to draw it out sometimes, to take their time and tease and make the climax that much more intense, but he doesn't think Ronan needs that at all right now. He looks up at Ronan for a moment, burning that expression into his memory.

Then he bobs his head, taking Ronan deeper. As deep as he can, and he wraps his hand around the rest and presses his tongue against the underside of Ronan's cock. Encouragement, an invitation maybe. He wants to make Ronan come, he wants this and he isn't thinking about anything else. It's not a duty or an exchange - he isn't doing it because Ronan blew him, he's doing it because he wants to, because there's very little in the world he likes more than making his boyfriend come. Because he loves him, because he likes to show his love with actions, because Ronan is incredibly sexy, because they're both teenagers with more hormones than sense sometimes. All of the above.]

[greywaren]

[Ronan gasps out a breath when Adam moves down lower, the sensation of his clever tongue working against him something that he's not likely to forget anytime soon. Adam is a god, and Ronan is all too willing to submit before him, particularly when it's so pleasurable, when Adam is here and willing and so earnest, with his mouth down on his cock and his hands sliding across his skin.

His body rolls upward- he can't help it- and he moans when he finally comes, the sensation sparking through his body like an electric shock. Adam is good at this, he's so good, and it's all Ronan can do to just ride out the full extent of his orgasm, his fingers tightening on Adam's hair to keep him down and on his cock, just for a few more moments.

He doesn't force him- Adam could pull away at any moment, but if he wants to stay, fuck that's hot, and Ronan is going to enjoy every second of it, every bit of warmth and wetness and the incredibly focused expression on the other boy's face. This is all he wants- being with him like this, unable to hold back.

Ronan says a few words, curses, Adam's name, some kind of worshipful words, before he collapses back against the wall with deep, gulping breaths of air, exhausted and sated and satisfied more than he's been in awhile.]

[unknowable]

[He stays where he is, riding out Ronan's climax with him. He loves the sounds Ronan makes, his musical cursing, the sound of his own name. Adam could never hear these kinds of things often enough. He likes the tension in Ronan's body, suddenly released, and he doesn't even mind the come - after all, he's had enough practice by now that it's not a surprise, not something that bothers him. On the contrary, he likes being there, he likes doing this for Ronan, another careful act of worship.

Which is to say, Adam doesn't have any compunctions about swallowing.

He pulls away only when Ronan is finished, breath coming a little ragged, and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand to clear away any remaining mess. Then he straightens from the slightly awkward position he'd been in and leans in to kiss Ronan's cheek, his hand resting on Ronan's thigh for another point of contact, a spot of warmth between them. It's far more sweet than hungry in this moment.]

I love you.

[greywaren]

[When he's done, it's all he can do to lean against the wall and catch his breath, letting his hand drop to Adam's shoulder. And then Adam is lifting up and talking to him, and Ronan cracks an eye open to look at him, before dragging him in for anther kiss, on the mouth this time.

Hearing those words again, for the second time from Adam is nothing short of magical. Ronan knows that he's loved him for awhile now, but letting Adam say it, letting himself hear it- it's more intense than anything else he's felt. He doesn't put much stock into words, but these words are different.]

I love you too.

[Ronan murmurs it softly, dragging his thumb across Adam's collarbone with a little smile. They're both still practically naked in public but- he can't really bring himself to care about that right now, not after everything else.]

[unknowable]

[If they were at home, all Adam would want would be to curl up with Ronan, bodies pressed close to together, and listen to him breathe. Maybe it's because he lacked physical affection for so long, maybe it's because it's easier to be vulnerable, maybe it's because of a hundred other reasons, but Adam likes to be close after they're finished. He likes to be able to hold Ronan or be held, to cuddle, to feel like he belongs there in Ronan's arms.

They're not at home, and this isn't an ideal location for that kind of thing, so Adam doesn't push it. But he catches Ronan's hand, brings his palm to Adam's lips and kisses the skin there softly.

He could hear Ronan say those words a thousand times and it would never feel any less incredible. He's never heard it from anyone else, never imagined it would be something anyone felt for him. Ronan rarely says it, but Adam treasures each time. It's an impossibility, Ronan loving him, but it's true.

He really just wants to curl up against Ronan and take a nap. But this isn't a good place for that.]

We should get home.

[greywaren]

Nngh.

[Ronan clearly doesn't want to move from where he is, but he nods with great effort anyway, hefting himself off of the wall to rest his elbows on his lifted knees and watch Adam prepare himself to go again. The problem is, he's sated now, and he's feeling lazy and happy and sleepy and if they could just curl up here, then he'd really appreciate it.

In the end though, he's aware of the fact that Adam is probably right- that they should get going, where there's a warm bed and blankets and no possibility of being walked in on, but it's hard and Ronan is prepared to complain about physical effort the entire way.

Still. His fingers curl lightly against Adam's jaw and Ronan offers him a faint smile, before stretching out and reluctantly reaching for his pants to shove a leg into and heft them back on.]

Then we're gonna crash in bed for the rest of the day. I've already decided.

[unknowable]

[It takes some effort, but he manages to force himself to put his jeans back on and pull his shirt over his head. He'll probably need a shower at some point, but it doesn't seem too pressing right now.]

Yeah? I guess I can't argue, then.

[Not that he would. Spending the day in bed with Ronan, napping or doing other things, sounds perfect. Especially right now, when he still feels warm and flushed with pleasure, with the happiness that comes along with knowing that he is loved. The actual act of getting home won't be that fun - all that walking, though really it isn't that far - but the payoff at the end is probably worth it.

He stands up, and holds out a hand to help Ronan up too.]

Maybe we can think a little about - sharing.

[About Ronan really moving in with him, that is, about them making a space together. Adam already considers his room partially Ronan's as well, it only makes sense when Ronan spends a majority of his nights there. They might as well make it official.]

[greywaren]

Let me get my sledgehammer and we can.

[Ronan quips back, easy as anything. The idea of staying with Adam permanently doesn't really give him pause- if anything, it's a thought that he agrees with. Ronan spends more nights with Adam than without him now, and while they typically sleep in Adam's room due to the mess in Ronan's, they've spent plenty of time together in both.

Ronan wouldn't mind condensing it into one room- he'd rather spend all of his time with Adam anyway- but he doesn't know how the other boy feels about the endlessly-growing piles of random junk in Ronan's room, or how Adam would feel if it took up space in a shared room instead. Adam is far more organized than Ronan himself, and while his room isn't spotless, it's nothing like the disaster-strewn area of Ronan's.

It had always been a topic for another day, before. Now, Ronan supposes, it is that other day. He peers toward Adam with a lazy, satisfied look and offers him a hint of a cocky smirk as he stands and reaches for his shirt.]

Hell, I'll get you one too. What do you know about remodeling?

[He doesn't think that they could actually get it looking perfect, but while Ronan has joked about demolishing the wall that separates their rooms before, now he's actually starting to think of it seriously. Moving their beds out of the way, dreaming up some plastic sheeting to cover things with, some goggles and gloves or whatever, and then just- destruction. A rug to cover the gap in the floor, some spackling for the walls and ceiling- it's not an impossible feat, really.]

[unknowable]

Almost nothing.

[But he could learn. Adam is rather sure that Ronan is mostly looking for a chance to smash things, but he can't be too bothered by that. It does sound satisfying.

Adam likes having his own space, he has since he left his father's trailer. It might not have always been nice, but it was his. And that's still true, it's just that now having Ronan around doesn't ever feel like losing that space. It's not about privacy, it's more about having a place that he knows is his, that he can retreat to if he needs to. He doesn't need to be able to lock Ronan out, because Ronan is a part of that.

Adam likes having him there, likes sharing that space with him. He thinks Ronan might feel the same, but he also knows that Ronan might worry about his dreams, might worry about not having somewhere else to sleep when he needs it. But Adam thinks that maybe they've gotten past some of that - Ronan pulls strange things out of his dreams, but so far nothing has hurt Adam, and Adam isn't at all afraid that it will.

And he wants this. He thinks, in a way, that it's inevitable. Ronan's in for the long haul and so is he. If they're both comfortable with each other, why wait even longer?]

As long as we can do it without too much structural damage, why not?

[greywaren]

Cool, [says Ronan, and the matter is settled.

Early on, there'd been the concern about having his own space because his space is a sacred area to him- where else would he go if he needed to retreat from everyone else, where he could put himself if he was worried about his dreams. But Ronan's dreams haven't been a problem in awhile now, and Adam has never really been everyone else.

Besides, he muses, if all else fails then he can move upstairs for a night or whatever.

Ronan tugs his shirt on, before making sure that he's got everything, slipping his feet into his shoes and helping Adam get situated as well. Gently, Ronan reaches up to tousle Adam's hair and get some of the dust and sex-frump out of it, eventually giving up and pulling back with a small grin.]

Ready?

[unknowable]

[Briefly, he envies Ronan's buzzed hair. Ronan never has to worry about walking around with messy I-just-had-sex hair. But he's pretty sure he couldn't pull the look off - and he doesn't really want to, not when it suits Ronan so very well.

He does reach out and smooth a few wrinkles from Ronan's clothes, though. It's more a gesture of affection than anything else, because Adam is well aware Ronan absolutely does not care about looking neat and put-together. But Adam likes touching him, especially right now, and so he indulges himself.

It'll be interesting to see the destruction he's just agreed to. But hey, their house can probably handle it. And who are they going to annoy with it? Noah's much more likely to be delighted by the prospect.]

Ready. Let's head home.